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I am Resolved

They will receive blessing from the Lord . . .(Psalm 24:5a NRSV)

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This practice of new year resolutions has taken many forms for me. For many years, the highlight of January 1st was to write out resolutions. Then my lack of keeping them dampened my enthusiasm. I gave them new names like goals and intentions, and recently (the past few years), I’ve distilled my need for a fresh focus into one word. And it works for me, so far.

I was surprised by the word that surfaced for 2019. Last year, my life was marked by release. And it was good. I got rid of stuff. I poured more into my creative life.  I worked on some creative writing and shared it with select groups for feedback.

So when, “receive” kept showing up in my journal writing, I resisted. How can a person who has mastered release, now expect to be open to “receive.” It feels awkward, and sort of humiliating. I’m a strong person, who gets rid of stuff, shares generously with others and pushes through creative blocks. I am a giver, not a receiver!

At least that’s the rant going on inside my head at the beginning of this journey. I will learn to be more receptive. I will accept the gift(s) of what it means to receive.

Part of receiving, coincides with my resolve to write daily. So far, so good. I think writing is one way to receive the gift of each day. By putting words on the page, I record thoughts, and often receive surprising insights and inspiration.

I’ve enjoyed responding to the ideas in the 365 book. (That’s what I’m calling it.) Day two encouraged me to write a list of resolutions. First response . . . resistance. Second response . . . oooh, a list! The freedom in this idea included writing down as many resolutions, as I wanted. Then, I was to go back over the list, and choose three. After choosing three, I could make a promise to keep those resolutions.

As often happens, when I tackle a prompt, it goes in a whole different direction, which is exactly why I like responding to prompts in my journal.

I wrote the list. I took a picture of part of it. (See above) On a side trip, I looked up the definition for resolution. Resolution means: “a firm decision to do or not do something” or “the action of solving a problem, dispute or contentious matter.” (www.dictionary.com)

Looking up the definition, actually released me from my prejudice of making and keeping resolutions. I felt more choice than I had in the past. I am capable of making firm decisions. I like solving problems. Maybe I could receive some resolutions this year. Yet, something else happened . . .  the resolutions morphed into affirmations. Here’s what I wrote:

I promise to believe in my abilities, skills, and experience. I will trust GOD with all my ways, being and doing.

I promise to accept the things I cannot change, to acknowledge when I am powerless.

I promise not to doubt my abilities, skills, and experience. I will listen to my desires, dreams, ambitions and even my intuitive bent, which includes wild, off the wall, weird and paradoxical ideas.

How do you feel about resolutions? If you were to receive a word for 2019, what would it be?

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3 thoughts on “I am Resolved”

  1. Kel, really appreciate this post. Like you, I have gotten discouraged by NY’s resolutions…. likely b/c I start out gung-ho and then have difficulty keeping them. Some Christians I know don’t believe in them, b/c they think they are tantamount to “vows,” and they quote the Bible vs. about that (can’t recall where it is offhand). But the thing is that vows, promises, resolutions are basically the same thing, and biblical I think. (Also, think of Jonathan Edwards marvelous list of resolutions)! The key is what we are vowing/resolving/promising b/f the Lord. I think much trouble today in our lax society stems from the fact that we don’t keep our word. Think of a wedding ceremony, where couples take vows. I brought this up to my friend, and suddenly, she believed in vows! 🙂 (And that Bible verse she had earlier mentioned to me can’t be taken out of context–meaning not all vows are bad). That said, we do not serve a divine taskmaster, but a God of grace. I think, we can resolve, before Him to obey in whatever way He asks, and if we get off track, etc., go to Him and ask His help anew (or forgiveness should that be called for). I love your word, RECEIVE! It is rich with meaning, and it resonates w/ God’s grace. We can’t muster ourselves w/ any am’t of resolution to be saved. It’s all a gift of our gracious God, and ours is to receive with gratitude. So perhaps if you think of your year as receiving all God has to offer, whether directly or through others, you will do this w/ grace, and not always feel as if you must be on the giving end (though surely I have been a most grateful recipient of your generous giving)! Giving is biblical, too, but God is asking you to focus on receiving. I love your list of affirmations, and of course, “accept” is a from of receiving. I, being a singer, especially love this definition of “resolve”: “Music . to cause (a voice part or the harmony as a whole) to progress from a dissonance to a consonance.” As you resolve to receive you are bringing your life into consonance with God. I pray for you happy harmony in 2019! There is one aspect to “receive” that you didn’t mention, but know. Will we receive *anything* from a good and gracious and sovereign God? Sometimes the trials are things I know I do NOT like to receive. And yet, I am asking Him to help me never to forget that He works *all* things together for good to those who love him and who are called according to His purpose. Receiving both what we perceive as good *and* not-so puts us in a posture of humility and submission to God. And yes, sometimes we think that receiving from others humbles, even beholds us to the giver. But I have been reminded recently, that not to receive someone’s gift is a form of taking from them a blessing. I know you personally are likely blessed as much as those who receive whatever you have so generously given.
    Last year, I didn’t receive a word from God, but tried to focus on my purpose (2 words), “encouraging transparency.” I have gotten discouraged in the past, when I don’t focus on my one word and live it out. But this year I sensed God prompting me to pray about one, and I was very surprised by His direction (repeated several times). It’s BUILD. I was really excited to see how many times that word is repeated in Scripture (which really apply to me personally right now), and also to delve into its dictionary meaning (many interesting nuances) and etymology (have you studied your word’s etymology yet)? Interestingly, here’s what I discovered on BUILD’s etymology: Middle English bilden, Old English byldan, derivative of bold. I am praying for God’s enablement to be a BOLD BUILDER in 2019! Love you so much, and forgive me for such an inordinately long comment. Ugh. Poor Kel if you have waded through to the end. May you RECEIVE my words w/ the love and grace that are intended. Happy 2019 dear receiver.
    Love
    Lynni

    1. Lynni-I received many blessings and insight from your thoughts. I receive these words gladly and am excited to see what bold building God has for you in 2019!

      I haven’t recorded the etymology of receive yet, but I look forwarded to digging into the root meanings.

      Thank you for your encouragement and I look forward to seeing you in 2019!

      1. I shall love seeing you! And keep us posted on that etymology. I always, like you, find those so rich. Wordlovers, unite!

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